This post is drifting from ‘Cinema’ to ‘Life.’
But Life is Cinema and Cinema is Life, so whatever you read will somehow bring us back to a connection between both.
I was saving up for a while now.
I was saving up money.
I was saving up pain.
I was saving up heartache
to vent out in the valleys.
Standing 8000 feet above the sea level, all I could think of was, a very very profound and valid question – ‘why?’
Why do I cry?
Why do I judge?
Why do I care?
Why do I worry?
Mother nature is gigantic and she doesn’t give a fuck about you. And I mean this in the most optimistic way. She is glorious and has so many, so many trees, birds, water cycle, rising and setting of sun, volcanoes, glaciers, snowfall, rain etc – headaches to look after. She isn’t concerned about how ‘big’, ‘powerful’ we are. She is way more accomplished than the human race combined.
Travelling makes one realise that there’s a world beyond our world that is filled with humility because that’s what accomplishment ought to accomplish – humility.
Chilling in 3 degrees, watching and waiting for the sun to rise, sharp at 6:13 am, life seemed so meaningful.
No, I wasn’t wasting my time.
Yes, I could’ve written instead, or read a book or whatever..
But I didn’t waste my time.
“We’re the all–singing, all–dancing crap of the world”
Chuck was right.
Building concrete walls and enslaving ourselves inside them, making our egos, our ‘reputations’ our little world. NO! That isn’t my world. I refuse to call it mine.
Money is a necessary means of exchanging services. It isn’t life.
I’ve decided to work very hard and every year, once, leave it all behind and embrace the beauty beyond my capacity.
To feel little and insignificant.
To die and to be resurrected.
P.S: While sitting in Darjeeling, hitch-hiking across north east, talking in broken bangla in Kolkata – I could think of movies like ‘Highway’, ‘ZNMD’ and ‘DCH’.
It felt good to live a movie for a change.